As a “gay” man, I have watched for many years (since I came out at age twenty) the willing self-exposure of more and more men (and women) about who they really are in terms of their sexuality. There should be no shame in being “gay” or “straight,” even though straight folks are certainly in the majority, regarding their sexual inclinations. Though the differences between straight and gay men are fundamental public judgments upon both, there is an age-old religious element responsible for the social and political persecution of homosexuals (and anyone else who is “too” different).
The only “condemnation” in the Christian Bible appears in the Old Testament book of Leviticus in which the judgment of men “loving” men is the same as that for eating shellfish. Thousands of years have evolved such judgments and funneled them down to condemning anyone who is “different” in that way. Modernity has gradually changed that optical lens.
Christianity’s track record on anyone who is too different isn’t exactly compassionate or forgiving in a stellar way. Living together despite our differences is certainly possible but not made any easier by religious zealots who need somehow to separate instead of to unite human beings as members of the same “family.”
I do understand the off-putting shock for some “straight” people seeing a pride parade with floats of scoffing and outrageously clad men, who sometimes seem to reduce the meaning of being gay to an in-your-face drag show intended to shock more than to promote any level of unity or compassion. That drag show element perhaps screams out against centuries of hateful abuse and cruel judgment, almost as a kind of revenge. I sometimes wonder if our cause is based simply upon the desire (need) to be accepted on our own terms as equals in an uncompassionate “straight” world. That subliminal rage from many centuries of cruel persecution is expressed by parading our most outrageous selves as the only way to share our sentiments with a world that is still judging us as bizarre extraterrestrials.
Time has certainly made a difference for the better, but this has occurred more from the ways we are alike than from our differences. Those differences are surely important, but stressing likenesses is also essential to mutual understanding. Love is love, no matter how it talks, dresses, or chooses its partners. Drawing people together on these issues is not easy, but it is more and more important in an arduous journey that continues.
My partner, Jim, and I have been together now for almost twenty years. He was married twice to women and has three grown children as well as many grandchildren and even great grandchildren. He can do plumbing, carpentry, and electrical work. He is most certainly not the typical gay image. My traits are not all stereotypical either, though compared to Jim, I should probably be wearing a ballet tutu (insert laugh here, please). However, this is America, where people are supposed to be “free” if they don’t harm others. I believe it is possible, even necessary that we all live together in peace and harmony. God bless America. JB
